How long?

Something I have been reminded of over and over this year is that hopefulness does not have an on/off  switch. When we read devotionals, see motivation online, or have a quick conversation with a friend, there seems to be a very fast transition from struggle to hope – probably within the span of a few sentences. In reality, I think that the distance between despair and peace is much wider, and we spend a great deal of time somewhere in between. Lately I have felt myself sliding in the direction of despair, stress, anxiety, and exhaustion, and I expect others may feel similarly. In times like this, it is strangely  comforting to know that there is an established precedent in Psalm 13 for communicating this feeling.  

1 How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever?  

How long will you hide your face from me?  

2 How long must I take counsel in my soul and  

have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long  

shall my enemy be exalted over me?  

3 Consider and answer me, O LORD my God; light  

up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death,  

4 lest my enemy say, “I have prevailed over him,” 

lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken.  

As I listen to the news on my way to work every morning, I find myself thinking along the same lines as  the first four verses of this psalm. This week I remember thinking, “Hey God, what is taking you so long?  If you wanted to fix all this stuff right now, you could. So what are you waiting for?”  

I think that it is helpful to acknowledge that hope cannot simply be turned on like a lightbulb; however, this is not a justification to remain in despair. Rather than seeking to switch hope on, try taking one small step toward the world, relationships, life, or faith that you strive for. Psalm 13 does not end after verse 4, and we don’t have to remain hopeless indefinitely either.  

5 But I have trusted in your steadfast love; 

my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. 

6 I will sing to the LORD, 

because he has dealt bountifully with me. 

Griffen Kociela